One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
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The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
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you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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