Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize
