You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
