Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize
