I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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