As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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