Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
