And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
