Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
