So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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