I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
