ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
