addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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