what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
