dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
