On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
