Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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