Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
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I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
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He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.