I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
