Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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