i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Randomize
