Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
