Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
