Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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