Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Randomize
