YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself