Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
