she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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