I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
