What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
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