You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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