I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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