): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize
