he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
