Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
