So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize