tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
