ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
