and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
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