Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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