I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
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