You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Randomize
