Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize