Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize