Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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