You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
