well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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