How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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