Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Randomize