atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize